The Grace In Letting Go

Life became ever so much easier when I finally accepted that I would befriend life! I would embrace its unfoldings and twists and turns with grace (sometimes not so gracefully) and with acceptance (and as little whining as possible). I recently came across this quote and immediately thought of how I would share it with you. “There is a great difference between defending life and befriending it. Defending life is often about holding on to whatever you have at all cost. Befriending life may be about strengthening and supporting life's movement toward its own wholeness. It may require us to take great risks, to let go, over and over again, until we finally surrender to life's own dream of itself.” ~ Rachel Naomi Remen

There is so much truth in this quote. When we are defending life we stick our heels in, we grab a hold and don’t want to let go and we justify and reason and excuse our way into holding on even tighter. Often this is done because we are afraid of the unknown. We would prefer staying in the comfort of even our dissatisfaction, boredom or disappointment. Sometimes we are scared we will fail. Sometimes we fear being judged. Sometimes we don’t even know why we are afraid.

But the act of releasing is what opens the door to the options, the choices and the moments for us to have the life we are intending to have. And isn’t that really the point? Sometimes we will have to suffer or feel loss, sometimes we do have to face fears, and sometimes we do have to screw up! But that is part of the big picture too! Those times are supposed to happen, they hold our lessons, our gifts or even our inspirations! They are the seeds waiting to burst forth in our personal garden. We need to stop stamping on them to keep them buried!

Awakening to the beauty of our dream in our real world is possible. We just have to learn how to do it. And if it is not modeled for us, it may feel awkwardly strange. If we have never been introduced to the importance of the letting go of control, we may not think we know how, but we do, innately, we do. Our inner truth, that little nudge you get when you are not being truthful with yourself or when you are making excuse after excuse is waiting to help you along, step by step. After a few attempts at letting go and surrendering, we begin to get better at it and feel a little less unnerved by it. And once we begin to see the beauty of it, the difference it makes in our lives and the way it impacts the essence of who we are….well, then there is a lovely relationship of graceful acceptance that enters your day.

Blessings ~ Lisa Meade ©COPYRIGHT 2013 Lisa Meade

Embracing the Shadow

“The problem with running away when a relationship becomes difficult is that it's also turning away from ourselves and our potential breakthroughs. Fleeing the raw, wounded places in ourselves because we don't think we can handle them is a form of self-rejection and self-abandonment that turns our feeling body into an abandoned, haunted house. The more we flee our shadowy places, the more they fester in the dark, and the more haunted this house becomes. And the more haunted it becomes, the more it terrifies us. This is a vicious circle that keeps us cut off from and afraid of ourselves."- John Welwood We don’t often want to face the shadows of ourselves. It is sometimes painful, often challenging and usually makes us feel quite vulnerable. But it is in the pliable place of vulnerability that our change can occur. If we can admit that we all need to change aspects of ourselves, that we outgrow ourselves, that we need to release old baggage and experience our breakthroughs, it makes the option of facing the dark shadows even more important.

We need to learn to stand in the face of our shadows and not run from them by creating stories or excuses. We are far stronger than we know ourselves to be. Our soul knows our strength and it will call to us when we are entering through the doors of self-rejection or self-abandonment. It does not want us not to be whole or to fragment our selves. Our innate wisdom knows that we will continue to cower in a corner unless we look into the face of the monster we have created for our shadow.

Yet, often, that is all it is. It is a manifestation of our fear that has grown larger than life in our minds and in our emotions. When we face our shadow, even if we need the support of someone to guide us on how to do this, we open wide the door for our personal growth and development. We move closer to our authenticity. We learn to look at our self with compassion and grace. And once we get comfortable with that….we then look to others with that same authenticity, compassion and grace. We bring it forward onto our daily path.

So the next time you are faced with your shadow, don’t back away, don’t retreat to the old story and excuses. Bravely look it in the eye, accept the lesson and gift it has brought with it. Open yourself up to the possibility that this time the effort will be worth it and that the freedom from fleeing this aspect of yourself will be worth it. Break the cycle and stop spinning in circles, instead take the step up out of the past and move into the brightness that the future holds for you.

Blessings ~ Lisa

©COPYRIGHT 2013 Lisa Meade

The Gratitude Equation

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, and confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”~ Melody Beattie There are times when it is easy to get down, to feel sorry for ourselves, and to only be able to see our glass half full. What is hard is to get out of that rut! To flip the coin and see the other side, even when we know we should. Being pessimistic is contagious too. How many times have you been in the company of someone who was the “Debbie Downer” and you find yourself viewing your day through that negative fog? It is so hard to shake.

I work at not going there. I put effort into keeping my perspective focused on gratitude. That does not mean I walk through life with rose-colored glasses on or that I don’t understand that bad things happen to good people. I am realistic. I am grounded. And I work with people every day who come to me because they are in need. They need someone to help them see the other side, someone to help them refocus, to heal or to gain a fresh perspective. It is my job as a spiritual life coach and a shaman. So that said, I begin each day with a focus on gratitude. It helps keep my vision clear and my heart open.

When you begin your thoughts for the day with gratitude you discover yourself in a place of abundance. There is a way to find balance. You create a relationship immediately between what you have and have not. And you begin to take back the power you would have otherwise given to the have not side of the equation. You find yourself completing sentences like, “I may not have the best job for my skills, but….” or “I may not have a life partner, but…” or “Today I don’t feel very good, but…” This conversation unfolds naturally because your soul has been inspired by your thoughts of gratitude to bring to mind what you do have, or will have or what is. Your soul steps in and fills the empty gaps that you would have otherwise filled with a negative point of view if you had not taken your daily dose of gratitude.

Try this simple exercise for one week. Begin each day, before you even hop out of bed. Think of 3-5 things that you are grateful for. Then launch your day. As you begin to move through the motions you will find areas where the contrast presents itself, but now you are armed with an awareness that shifts the perspective. Now you see that there is more to you and your reality than just the deficits, the negatives or the pains. This awareness helps you move through the landmines of life with a dance of grace and a heart filled with appreciation of the possibilities.

Blessings ~ Lisa

©COPYRIGHT 2013 Lisa Meade

You Are Love

Can you believe that many love you? The fact that you are loved by those in your life may be easier to accept. But what of the love of those you do not know? What of the love of those you will never know? Can you believe that many love you? Can you believe that this love is what brings you into your Being? Walking. I am listening to a deeper way. Suddenly all my ancestors are behind me. Be still, they say. Watch and listen. You are the result of the love of thousands. ~ Linda K. Hogan Love is the energy of the cosmos. As long as beings have been on this green globe there has been love. And I have to believe that out in the beauty of the stars and galaxies there exists a love equal to or even more profound than that we know of. It is within this love that we are all created.

Our essence is born of the ancestor’s breath. They breathe us into Being. They fuel the fire of our souls and quicken the embers within us to blaze. Within this fire the passion of our life is born. All our possibilities crystallize into form. All our gifts manifest. And within our birthing heart is gently placed this gift of love to carry forth to others.

Love is meant to be shared. It is the most valuable offering we have. And there is always enough love; we just have to be open to see it, to receive it, and to then give it to the next. It is within this relationship that it becomes stronger and stronger still.

If we listen closely to our hearts, in this deeper way, we can hear of the path our love has traveled. Our guides, our angels, our ancestors … they all have a role in the story of the creation of our love and our coming into our truest self. It is this love that makes us shine with brilliance and beauty. It brings to our presence the gifts of compassion and grace. It opens our hearts to forgiveness and understanding. Love helps guide the way to our authenticity and calling.

Be still and listen. Know that you are a being of love, created from the love of many lifetimes before this. Know that the celebration of your being was observed throughout the Universe and the moment of your first breath, the promise of more love to flow and follow was born. Blessings ~ Lisa

©COPYRIGHT 2013 Lisa Meade