Peppered Throughout the Day

Admittedly, I have very busy days. With five children, even those out on their own need TLC regularly, my darling husband, three separate careers, ongoing course work and all the small stuff… well, you can imagine. We all have full or overflowing plates it seems. Given that, I am quite certain that a small and simple acts that I have placed into the tiny spaces of free time that are left in my day are what save me. These acts keeps me grounded. They preserve my focus on my intentions. They help me stay connected to Spirit. They also support me in letting the petty problems that I stub my ego on throughout the day, roll off my back. They allow my heart to stay open to others.

So what are these small and simple acts that I weave through my day? I pepper my day with moments of prayer, deep breathing, positive affirmations, chants, meditations and more. These small undertakings keep the flow in my day. I rarely get stuck anymore. I am not saying I don’t have a “bad” day from time to time, that is inevitable, but these choices I make to bring the focus back can help save the day from falling completely into that deep black hole!

It is not unusual to find me chanting through a red light. You may see me whispering a mantra to myself as I chop the onions for the veggie chili for dinner. You may find me with my eyes closed after getting off the phone with one of my adult children, sending them prayers of positive energy and light to assist get them over whatever troubling speed bump they are facing.

People often wonder at how they can “become” more spiritual. It is as though they think there is a course they can take or a method that they can be trained in. The reality is that we are spiritual beings and we forget that beautiful truth. Being spiritual means just that…be spiritual. Bring whatever sacred act you feel connected to, whatever resonates with you into your life regularly and meaningfully. You must practice trusting it, honoring it, celebrating with it and relying on it.

Life will give you all the opportunities to put it into practice. And your mind will try to tell you there is not enough time. BUT that is exactly when you need it the most! Making time for your spirituality is as important as making time to exercise, or making time to eat healthy whole foods, or making time to laugh. Without it…what kind of a life are you living? You get to choose each and every glorious day!

Blessings ~ Lisa

©COPYRIGHT 2012 Lisa Meade

Are You Your Own Bully?

I have come across a common complaint among many of my spiritual life coaching clients. They are tired of beating themselves up and want to stop. The reasons for this behavior are as different and diverse as the clients themselves, but almost all began in childhood. Being unusually hard on themselves, many of these clients have subtle patterns and overt behaviors that often go unnoticed or accepted by others in their lives. Think of the people in your life who you know have great difficulty accepting a compliment, or those who are never satisfied with the work they do and seem to always find fault with some aspect of it, or those who can get particularly worked up and angry with themselves over some small shortcoming or flaw. Any kind of failure is unacceptable.

This self-bullying behavior sends very distinct messages to our bodies. It also takes a great amount of energy. Imagine the time that is wasted in this activity! If you wish to see what if feels like to be a bully to yourself, get quiet and focused. Think about a time when someone made you feel really bad about yourself. Maybe they humiliated or embarrassed you, or perhaps they yelled at you and used you as an example to others. How is your body reacting? How do you feel? What thoughts begin to go through your head? For some, this reaction, these thoughts and these feelings are far too common.

Not treating yourself with respect and in a kind manner is like a bad habit. For those who have been at it for a while, it is very hard to break the pattern. But being aware of how it makes us feel, focusing on the time and energy we are wasting doing it and wanting to make a change are all part of the first steps in transitioning out of this behavior. I often suggest to my clients to make notes about how bullying makes them feel both during the actual act and then later. Sometimes this gentle noticing brings about such a strong want to change that they are able to make the necessary shifts in thoughts and perspectives to do so. For most there is a deep desire to be healthy and happy, to live a life filled with peace and contentment. If that want can shine through the fog that is created by self-bullying then the change can begin.

Blessings ~ Lisa

©COPYRIGHT 2012 Lisa Meade

Recordings From Your Past

We bring to our day stories and memories from our past. These have been there for as long as we can remember. They are a very big part of who we think we are and how we face our day. How much influence they have depends on the power we allow them to have. If we reflect on our childhood and pick a topic, such as money, marriage, family, friends, sex, or career, we may find that there are recordings that play through your thoughts today. They create images and influence our opinions. Many of our thoughts are the filters through which we process our information and our beliefs. Let’s pick one of the above topics so that I can illustrate. Let’s choose money. Perhaps you grew up hearing, “Money doesn’t grow on trees!” You can imagine then how this would influence your relationship with money today. Maybe you have a bit of guilt when you spend money frivolously or perhaps you have used this recording to support your desire to save. This is not to say these recordings are good or bad. Simply, the impact that they can have on our current day actions and choices is constantly there.

Let’s try another topic. Let’s see what the recordings are for body image. “You should watch what you eat, it goes right to your hips.” “You are a beautiful and healthy person.” “You are clumsy.” Are you hearing some recordings coming through?

Being aware of what we bring to our relationship with self and others is important. Especially if we want to have a better understanding of why we do what we do or think what we think. Many of the recordings influence our relationships, act as a filter and can be a mirror that reflects our world back to us. Having insight to these messages from our past helps us balance our perspective on things.

These messages could have the power to limit us or propel us forward. These messages are not necessarily our truth, but we can give them supremacy and they then rule. We can understand them enough to use them as tools, allow them to be part of the equation in a balanced fashion and make them only one ingredient in the recipe we use to create our day.

These recordings from our past are a big part of who we are, but they do not define us. AND they are manageable you are in control of them and their influence. Become the master of your thoughts and take ownership of the messages they relay to you.

Blessings ~ Lisa

©COPYRIGHT 2012 Lisa Meade

Living Authentically...A Worthy Investment

Some of us grew up learning that pleasing others and playing by their rules kept the peace. But it also kept us weighted down and unable to touch our truth. Perhaps with time we learned how to be more honest with ourselves and others, to meet our own needs and not to need the approval of others to get through our days. If we were able to grow out of that phase of living through and for others, we then began to dream our own dreams, longed to be our own person and live the life we hoped for that has healthy intentions, inner peace and compassion of self and others. We have learned that we wish to be authentic with ourselves and others and have this show in our lives.

For some living authentically means taking some risks. Sometimes this means moving, job changes, relationship changes, going back to school, lifestyle changes….you get the picture. And when we make these types of changes, it is not uncommon to receive feedback, often unsolicited, from those who are put off or put out by our changes. They may feel judged. They may feel you are making a huge mistake. They may not understand.

But if we have made these changes and decisions based on much consideration and they are in alignment and in harmony with all that is important to us, we are living authentically. It does not matter what others think. It does not matter if they agree. If we have that heart assurance that our decisions are right for us…then we are on the right path.This does not mean that it will be easy. Actually, trying to live authentically is often met with many challenges, and not only from others in our lives. It means breaking out of our comfort zone, changing our patterns and habits, asking ourselves questions that run deep and dredge up truth that must be faced and sometimes dealt with. But every effort we make to life this life of authenticity rewards us in some way with a life filled with delight, honesty, love, and peace.

And honesty is a big piece of the authenticity equation. The more we are honest with ourselves and others, the more our life begins to look like the life we want to live. But for some of us, it is hard to define our truth. It is buried deep beneath layers of people pleasing, layers of not drawing attention to ourselves or layers of self-deception of some kind. We can also come up with great excuses for not facing our truth; we don't have the time or the skills. Life is so busy after all! But that is the point! Part of the busy-ness of our lives is because we are avoiding the fact that we are not living authentically. This distraction buffers our disappointment or our discomfort.

To find our truth and to find what we need to do or not do in order to live an authentic life we must quiet down, create space for the discovery, make time to find our questions and our answers. Tuning in to who we really are, not our self assigned labels or what others think of us is the beginning of the breakthrough. We will begin to define what we stand for, how we feel, what we believe in…all without pretense or misunderstanding. We will begin to feel passion for life, self-respect and dignity, and a sense of inner truth. And as an added bonus, we will begin to attract people into our life who resonate with our authenticity. People who support our growth and hold love for us in their hearts.

What this means is that we do not have to go it alone. We discover the interconnectedness of us all. We share more than we admit we do. We are able to receive and give freely without keeping tabs or feeling needy. It is life affirming when we find ourselves in the company of someone else striving to live their life authentically as well.

To live life authentically, one must be willing to take the time needed to transform, be willing to take big leaps of faith and small steps - one at a time and be willing to live in the moment, embracing the gifts and lessons as they unfold. Living authentically is investing in a rich life, filled with what we desire, believe in and find meaning in…and it is always worth it!

I am off for the weekend, but will be back again on Monday. Meanwhile, feel free to share with us some of the changes you have made to live an authentic life.

Blessings ~ Lisa

©COPYRIGHT 2012 Lisa Meade